i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
