Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
