am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
