I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
