youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize