she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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