Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
