end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
