Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
