I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
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