After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
