either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
