stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
