escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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