do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
You did what with his pubic hair?
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