tell your sister to shave her snatch
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
we're making bets on your personal life
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
