The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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