We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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