On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
