the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
