i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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