If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
