so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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