4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
