I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
