I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
