yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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