Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
