She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
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