Quick, to the slutcave!
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
