is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
