Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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