Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
