I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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