shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
