He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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