Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Randomize
