I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
