I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
