i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
