i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize