Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
