The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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