I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
