tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Randomize
