i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize