im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize