Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
