He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
