fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
