Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
