I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
