im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
