Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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